The Defense Mechanism Club
On this fine Monday, let's take a moment for some self-reflection ? Have you ever found yourself in a situation where it felt like life just didn’t want to cooperate, and you responded with excuses like:
1. "Today is just not my day."
2. "I didn’t have enough time to prepare for this."
3. "It’s written in my fate that I won't succeed today."
If so, welcome to the club of defensiveness! I consider myself one of the most dedicated members, so don't worry or feel embarrassed. While it may feel uncomfortable, defense mechanisms can actually teach us valuable lessons, along with granting us a complimentary membership to the "Defense Mechanism Club." But here’s a secret... There are ways to escape this club! Interested in learning what they are? Then keep reading this blog until the end!
While giving entry into the “Defensiveness Club’’, we do assess our entries from the beginning, and these are some of our findings for the same (I.e. the most common defense mechanisms known to mankind) are:
Denial
Denial is where the person is completely refusing to accept the reality/or what happened.
Examples:
Denying responsibility during a stressful situation.
Denying painful facts (such as the demise of someone close, having a health problem).
Impact:
. It can be difficult to accept their mistakes.
. It can increase anxiety levels in one.
Projection
Projection arises at a situation where you want to channel/showcase certain your own negative feelings/thoughts/comments onto others.
Examples:
Negatively commenting on people’s posts/content.
When you have romantic feelings for someone, you might project your feelings on them, making it look like they like you instead.
Impact:
Can lead to a lot of misunderstandings and conflicts between people.
Before one knows it, this would be a recurring pattern of behaviour.
Regression
Regression, have you ever felt threatened from a particular situation ? And maybe even seen your inner child or should I say your childhood self came out of nowhere to escape this situation?
Examples:
Whenever an adult faces even a small disturbance in their work/life in general – they start to throw tantrums, bicker, about their issues.
Throwing/portraying these kinds of behaviours can always provide comfort to the individual, but can also deeply affect their inter-personal relationships. (For example it may look like - Overly depending on their partner).
Impact:
Very irregular coping mechanisms/strategies especially during the times of stress.
In the long-term it would be very difficult for them to “adult” (meaning live as an adult, or even deal with issues as one, along with it straining their relationships etc)
Reaction Formation
Reaction Formation springs up as a defense mechanism when an individual expresses the complete opposite of their actual/true feelings.
Examples:
Whenever one feels threatened in a situation, then they would use this defence mechanism to criticize others and let them down to feel better about oneself.
One always finds themselves in constant conflict with their close friends and family members.
Impact:
In the long-term it can also affect one’s true self/personality. Because of the constant suppression of it, and their urge to act the complete opposite.
Would always be facing a psychological toll, because their emotions would be switching from one to the other.
Rationalization
Ever seen yourself justifying certain types of actions with any kinds of seemingly logical reasons. Then that would be Rationalization.
Examples:
If a student doesn't do well in their exam, then instead of accepting that they didn't put that much effort into it. They would instead put the blame on their teacher, the pen that they were writing with etc.
Constant comparison with people around them.
Impact:
Delaying in one’s personal growth (especially mentally).
Will have a distorted version of reality and will never lead to emotional maturity.
After learning about these defense mechanisms, you'll likely retain some of this information for a while. So, what should you do when these mechanisms keep coming up in the future? Don’t worry; we have some tips to help you manage them effectively. As you go through these suggestions, remember that these habits are completely normal, and there's no need to feel ashamed. However, if you do want to gain better control over them, you can do so with the following tips:
Identify the trigger points when the defence mechanism starts to show up.
Take small steps towards achieving mindfulness and self-awareness.
If the whole situation gets overwhelming, then do consider taking therapy.
Make a list of positive coping strategies (such as – self-affirmations, establishing health boundaries).
