When does ‘Delulu being the solulu’ go too far ?
As a Gen-Z, I usually stay on top of trends, and engage with various social media platforms. Additionally, my work as a mental health content writer requires me to keep an eye on trends to ensure we remain relevant.
However, there is one particular trend that seems to have emerged from pop culture about a year ago. While I am a firm believer in the concept of “manifesting” (the idea of imagining that we already have what we've longed for), I am strongly against the notion of “Delulu being the Solulu”.
I acknowledge that this was just a trend back in the day, but I want to share my alternative thoughts and insights on it. So, are you all ready to deconstruct this trend and explore where things might have gone wrong?
Lets start with an example!
You're texting someone every day. You have deep conversations with them at night, they send you cute reels, and they even say “I miss you” sometimes. Your heart tells you it’s love, even though they’ve never clearly said what they want. You imagine this is how all great love stories begin. You tell your friends, “I know they like me, they’re just bad at expressing it.”
This is peak 'Delulu is the Solulu'!!
You're clinging to delusion instead of clarity, hoping that if you just “manifest hard enough,” it will turn into a real relationship. You ignore all the signs: they don’t make time for you, they flirt with others, and they avoid commitment conversations.
So, what goes wrong?
You invest months (sometimes years), get emotionally drained, and when they finally say “I never promised you anything,” you're shattered. Your self-worth takes a hit. The fantasy crashes and you realize the “solulu” was never real.
But what exactly is Delulu?!
The term “delusional” has three meanings in this context. The first refers to the trend in the example where “delulu” signifies having
“unrealistic expectations or believing that certain outcomes will occur”.
The second meaning relates to “Delusional Disorder,” which can include a
“firm belief in something that does not exist in reality and lasts for a period of at least one month”.
And the third meaning being “delusions” as a symptom of schizophrenia. It appears that the "trend" surrounding these psychiatric disorders is quite different from their actual "textbook meanings."
To truly understand the "delulu" culture, we need to explore how it can go completely off the rails in today's society:
Living in a fantasy world while struggling to return to reality can create a pathway to toxic positivity.
When there's little distinction between "visualizing" and being "delusional," the implications can be serious.
Furthermore, this term can be used harmfully in contexts where it doesn’t contribute anything meaningful.
It can also lead to significant issues in relationships, especially when one partner harbors unrealistic expectations of the other.
Let’s rethink the above example
Same situation. But this time, instead of spiraling into a love fantasy, you pause and ask yourself:
➡️ Have they communicated clear intentions?
➡️ Are their actions consistent with their words?
➡️ Am I making up a story because I want it to be true?
You have an honest conversation with them early on. When they say, “I’m not looking for anything serious,” you believe them. Not because you’re pessimistic, but because you're rooted in reality. You walk away with your peace (and self-respect) intact.
That’s relulu. That’s the solulu.
Today’s culture often glorifies “manifesting your dreams” even when those dreams ignore reality. But wishful thinking isn’t always self-care. Sometimes, it’s self-sabotage in disguise.
Choosing Relulu over Delulu doesn’t mean giving up on magic! It means choosing yourself over illusions.
So, let’s take the phrase “Delulu is the only Solulu” and change it to “Relulu is the new Solulu.” Why not? Here are some ways we can accomplish this:
Embrace the confidence that comes from a touch of delusion and put yourself out there.
Utilize your vision boards to their fullest potential by visualizing yourself achieving your goals, but be careful not to become overly delusional.
If this approach helps you cultivate a positive attitude and shift your perspective on situations that once brought you down, then it's definitely worth pursuing. After all, who wants to remain stuck in a fixed mindset?
Apart from gaining your confidence, who knows? With those "fantasies" and "delusions" we have, some of us could be great writers as well, right? If so, you should start writing that book right away!
As Hannah Montana says in her song “Get the best of both worlds!”, next time, let’s make an effort to avoid being overly “delulu” and encourage those around us to use these terms thoughtfully. Until the next blog post, I hope you all embrace the phrase “Relulu is the new Solulu” enthusiastically! Take care, you lovely human beans !
